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Speaking Their Language

Love can be expressed and felt in different ways - too obvious? Now more than ever, especially in dating, this awareness has been heightened. So taking the time, and going the extra mile to understand how people show and process affection is one way to ensure your connections grow stronger.

Quarantine is the perfect time to focus on growing and making new connections. That’s right, time to dust off your copy of The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman. If you don’t have a copy yet, get one! You are bound to find a new level of appreciation in communication and will be able to use it when dating. As matchmakers we find the love languages to be useful as it makes singles more aware of what they need from a potential partner.

Clarity in knowing how to give and receive love allows us to see if another person can meet our needs, as well as determine if you can meet theirs. It’s OK if the person you are dating has different love languages than you. As each date is unique, so is the love language they may speak - but that doesn't necessarily mean that you aren’t compatible, it just means that you may need to give and receive different things from each other.

We can find fun ways to express and accept love, even now. Whether it's a budding romance, family, friends, or for yourself. You will find more success in all aspects of your life when you practice mindful communication with the intention of meeting the needs of those you care about.

For each love language, let’s get creative on how to show you are interested and care during this period of distancing. The following are ideas should be fun, while practicing sensitivity and compassion for people with different languages:

Words of Affirmation

  • Send a card via snail mail or hand deliver it yourself! Of course you can send a text, email, call or video chat, but sometimes a personal heartfelt hand-written note will mean more than you’ll ever know.

Quality Time

  • Yes, video chatting is a great way to spend time together, but do it intentionally--plan a meal, play a game OR get off the screen and go on a social distancing hike or picnic.

Physical Touch

  • This is definitely going to be the hardest - take this time to grow your relationship in a stronger, more emotionally intimate way. As safety and comfort are top of mind, a conversation is key to adding physical intimacy. It’s not ideal, but you may even start off by wearing gloves. If so, definitely make it cute - bring two pairs of “ hand holding gloves” to show awareness and thoughtfulness as people re-introduce themselves back into socializing face-to-face.

Receiving Gifts

  • Delivery! Show the love - and why not support your local economy too. Surprise them with a special care package or a personal item to show you’re here, interested and sending your affection.

Acts of Service

  • Everyone is talking about things they want to accomplish...and we all have our “to do’ lists. Listen to what he/she is focusing on and figure out a way to help out from a distance! How great would it feel to have your lawn mowed, garden weeded or planted or even your dog all of this is a great way to spend time together (and continue to get to know each other more) all while speaking their love language!

Curious to see what your love languages is….or even the love language of someone you are dating or getting to know? Let’s make it easy! Take this quiz to find out today:

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